As I was discussing faith with a dear friend I met through our similar experiences with infant loss, we were discussing our responses to the fatal diagnoses of our babies. She asked the question, “Can you imagine the loss without Faith?” and added, “I think that is why so many struggle.”
Just as I responded to her, I don’t know how we could have any kind of peace and healing without clinging to God instead of running from Him. Just like in human relationships, Love is running to someone when we FEEL like running away.
I’m sure I’ve written before about what a difference I saw in my own marriage when I started going to my husband more when I felt like pulling away because I was frustrated or my feelings were hurt. Going against that selfish human nature really does make a big difference. I still have to make a conscious effort to do it and I’m by no means a pro at it… but I’m still working on it!
As a mom, I try to make a continual effort to reinforce that thought too. I love that even when my son is mad at me and throwing a fit, he’ll still lay his head on my shoulder and hug me back if I pick him up to hug him. I never want to lose that. Never. I want him to know that’s how his relationship with God should be too. Even if he doesn’t understand, or if he feels hurt… he still needs to cling to God. God will still be there to comfort him, even if discipline is needed.
Writing this article, I just hope to remind you that God’s love is perfect. Yes, in human relationships, there is the potential that even when we respond with the kind of love God has modeled to us, we may not receive the response we hope to receive. With God, we always will. Even if we don’t get the answers we think we want, we will always have His unselfish love.
In your marriage, and in your family – make a conscious effort to model THAT kind of love. While it is true that it takes choosing to be vulnerable to hurt feelings, the potential results can be amazing. Love as God has instructed you to love, and your marriage will be elevated!
Keri Kitchen is a devoted wife and mother, blogger, author of Love Isn’t Selfish, licensed mental health counselor, and founder of The Carys Rainn Foundation. To read more about what God is doing in her life, visit her blog at www.aftertherainn.com